Let me ask you this: when was the last time you did something that scared you? Maybe it was just last night getting that cockroach out of your apartment (ew, good for you, I'm still deathly afraid) or maybe it was a few months ago when you took on a new project at work that you were a little apprehensive about. No matter how big or small the feat, it is so important that we get outside of our comfort zones and tackle our fears.

Get ready to laugh. Friday was my day off and Michael took a half day, so he took me skiing at a mountain nearby. I've never been skiing before, but I was really excited and thought I would be able to pick up on it quickly. After all, I would say I'm in shape, I used to water ski all the time and I have pretty good balance. It couldn't possibly be that hard, right?

I get my skis on, and I freeze up (no pun intended). I'm like a drunk child trying to walk and failing miserably. You guys, it took me about 20 minutes just to get over to the lift...this whole skiing thing did NOT come naturally at all!!! I looked up at the slope above (a bunny slope, at that) and I was SCARED. Freaked the eff out. I don't do heights and I don't do rollercoasters, so the thought of gaining speed and cruising down the slope made my heart race. 

Fast forward, we get on the lift. We're halfway up and I just break down. Literally start crying out of no where. I just thought, "I can't do this." If you've ever seen the Kardashian episode where Kim breaks down before going zip lining, that was me. Quite accurately. (Fast forward to :11 please..)

[embed]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GqzU0-lW4M8[/embed]

If it wasn't for Michael there telling me what I always preach, "YOU CAN DO ANYTHING YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO," I would have given up. So I'm crying and manage to hop of the ski lift and wipe out. Michael starts teaching me how to cruise down and I just keep falling. And crying. I cried like four times. This shit was HARD. I was about to give up, and Michael just looks at me and tells me to "have some damn faith in myself" and it just clicked - I NEEDED to do it. There was no turning back because it wasn't like I could just walk down. So I get up and just keep repeating in my head "you can do this, it's okay." So I did it. It took a long ass time, I probably fell about 25 times and I WISH I had video to see how much of an idiot I looked like. But I made it down the slope. And then I immediately ran up to the bar for a beer. PHEW!!  

So the moral of the story is: I desperately need some ski lessons FACE YOUR DAMN FEARS!! No matter how much something scares you, when you get to the other side and conquer that fear, it only makes you that much stronger. 

I hope you enjoyed this story. Have a wonderful week, everyone and break down those obstacles.

XO- Rach

When was the last time you overcame a big fear?

Is there a motto or saying that helps you get through tough times?

Moving in with your boyfriend/girlfriend/husband/wife for the first time can be all kinds of scary, intimidating & exciting – ALL the feels. If you know me or if you’ve been following along with this blog for a while, you probably know that Michael and I have been together for about four years now and one of those years we did the long distance thing. By an act of some miracle, we both graduated (a year apart) and were able to find jobs in the same STATE. This was a big deal. I still remember the feeling of when I got the phone call that I got the job – it’s like one of those feelings that you want to bottle up and feel forever.  Michael had been already working for a good six months when I moved up to Philadelphia and for the summer it was kind of like we were still long distance because Michael’s job is located in Emmaus, PA, an hour away from Center City Philly. It was still tough. I started to get used to only seeing him on the weekends, and that’s no good. We were sick and tired of all the traveling and commuting. We both knew that the only way we could make it work and make it REALLY work is if we got our first place together when his lease was up in July.

I wasn’t sure that I wanted to move outside of Center City just yet or if I was ready to move in with him. I actually never felt ready, to be honest. I like my alone time. Sometimes I’m selfish and messy, and I like not wearing pants or a bra at home. He assured me that last one was not an issue.

So we got a place together that’s about a 30 minute train ride to work for me and an hour drive to work for Michael. He’s a trooper. I love living with him. I always have my best friend around to make me laugh when I’m down, help me reach the things in the cabinet that I can't, call me out on my bull shit and push me to work harder to reach my goals.

It’s not all fun and games, though. There’s definitely been some adapting, compromising and learning. And there still is, it’s only been 4 months! So if you’re planning to move in with your significant other, here is some food for thought that helped me. I also reached out to a few of my blogger friends in similar boats for their perspective!  I like to call it the three C’s and a P! (Communicate, Compromise, Clean & Plan)

Communicate

This is the biggy. If one or the other likes something a certain way, state your opinions and talk through it. Communicating about everything will save you so many stupid little arguments! Does it really matter who emptied the dishwasher one extra time or who forgot to take the trash out? You can't let little things get to you if you don't say anything. 

Only worry about things that actually matter. Don't get into an argument if someone forgets to unload the dishwasher. It's not worth it. "Choose your battles" couldn't be more true! - Erin Druga of thealmondeater.com

For me it was about learning how to live with the other person's habits, while being polite (trying to, most of the time) if I want him to do something around the house. Serious team work! - Jess Dang of hellotofit.com

Compromise

You're not the only one that matters. I was so used to doing whatever I wanted whenever I wanted throughout college and when we were so far apart for so long, so when we moved in together I learned that I need to be considerate of what Michael wants to do too. This is an ongoing work in progress for me but it's become a lot easier since we've moved in together. I'm not as stubborn when he asks me nicely to put my laundry basket in the place where it belongs. Hey, small progress is still progress! The long distance actually made our relationship a lot stronger. I think if we were able to get through that, we can pretty much get through anything. 

I just moved in with my fiance of four and a half  years this past June. It's been going great so far! We even spent a year in a long distance relationship before moving in together. It's been a wild ride but definitely worth it. Honestly, I think the distance brought us closer together and made us cherish our time with each other even more. It strengthened us. - Kaylin Gilkey of enticinghealthyeating.com

We had to learn to be flexible and respect each other's schedules. As a morning person, I'd be up at 5 a.m. to go to the gym and he'd sleep in until 7 a.m., so I changed my routine to get ready in the bathroom to not wake him up. On the other end, he had to learn that I needed to be in bed at 10pm. It was a matter of finding a balance in our conflicting schedules. - Emily Ruth Weir of emilyruthweir.com

You have to be quiet if you're going to bed later or getting up earlier. This was such an adjustment since my schedule is all over the place sometimes. It's just like having a roommate so you have to figure out all those weirds details - only the stakes are higher so the ups and downs are sometimes a little more intense. - Amanda Dewitt of semihealthyblog.com

Clean

I mean, this is pretty straightforward. Don’t be a slob, college is over. Or maybe it isn’t, but if you live together in college that’s some serious dedication and you probably know more than I do. I'm still working on cleaning up my own messes...

Plan Dates & Weekend Getaways

Keep it fresh! Don't get stuck just hanging at home watching Netflix every weekend. Explore, get out of your routine and make time to do something special with each other every week. Even though we live together, I still get so excited to go out for a nice dinner or travel to a new place together. We're both crazy busy during the week and hardly see each other, so it's so nice to have a night or weekend to catch up, relax and reset. 

Plan date nights. My boyfriend and I love to have little picnics inside our apartment as "date night." We dress up, make a fun meal, and enjoy a night in! We also like doing small little things for each other. - Alexa Peduzzi of fooduzzi.com

So, moral of the story is to remember the three C's and a P when you move in together! In all seriousness, though, if you are in a serious relationship, moving in together & long distance alike are the ultimate tests to if it really works. There's a lot to get used to, but overall it's such an exciting step in a relationship. 

We have learned so much about each other. I would highly recommend living with a significant other before getting married to be sure that you are able to physically live with them as a full packaged deal. - Kirsten Platto of ladyandtheroutine.com

XO- Rach

If you live with your S.O., what's the biggest thing you've learned?

Fact: We are our own worst critics. Our millennial culture has an overarching do better, work harder, don't stop stigma that can create a sense of shame if we don't do what we are "supposed" to do, look a certain way or even act a certain way. Popular sayings like 'YOLO,' 'Work hard, play hard,' and 'Nobody cares, work harder,' force us to submit to that status quo. There's always so much pressure. But here's the question I've been asking myself: does this actually do more good than harm?

It's only human to feel self pity when we go through tough times or when things don't play out exactly how we want them to. It happens, and that's life. I've been through a couple things that made me really question life and why I do what I'm doing. What's my purpose here? Why aren't I doing more to better my friends, family, the world, myself?

These questions used to come up frequently, and I'm sure that some of you might relate. But here's the thing, focusing on what we think we should do and what we could have done better and not what we've accomplished and what we're good at creates a path un-wandered that may possibly turn into a dark road. Why do we do that? Why do we constantly beat ourselves up for 'failing' when in reality, maybe it was just a sharp turn in the road that's going to drive us to reach our goals in the long run?

For example, I sit here writing this post in bed at 8 a.m. after hitting snooze a million times. I was 'supposed' to get up and workout at 6 a.m. I was frustrated with myself for not waking up and sweating off last night's Cookie Butter Ice Cream, but then I thought, maybe my body just doesn't want it right now. Nobody will notice unless I make it an issue. I needed that extra two hours of sleep. There's always later to sweat, or tomorrow. Tomorrow is always a new day. Getting into a habit of self love begins in the mind and the heart. It's all about being present and doing what you feel in the moment. Not what anyone else wants or what you think society expects of you. What you want and what you feel.

Being kinder to myself is something that I try to work on every day, and like previously stated, it starts with relaxing the mind. Practicing yoga has helped a TON. If you haven't tried yoga, please don't knock it until you try it. It works. It teaches you to let go of everything and just focus on making yourself feel good in the present moment.

And let me tell you, being present works wonders. Focusing on what you have accomplished and what you're working on now instead of what you could be doing is a great starting point to being kinder to yourself. I'm usually a 'live in the moment' kind of person but lately I've been falling into a trap of being a lot harder on myself than I need to be. As I look for jobs and will be graduating soon, I have so many questions about where I'll be in the next five years. Sure, I have direction and I have goals, but the only thing set in stone right now is how I am living today to my fullest potential. I have been putting so much effort and time into my future life that I'm letting the here and now slip away.

I realized this yesterday after I taught my group fitness class. I only have one more month teaching here at UF and it's been such an amazing time. I've met some people who have stuck with me since I taught my first class two years ago (you know who you are.) I had a moment driving home where I almost got emotional because I was thinking just how much I am going to miss it! And everything about my time here for that matter. And then I started thinking about everything that I've accomplished here in college, the people I've met and my impact. I felt proud of myself and at peace. I was present.

My point here is that although we need to have goals and look toward the future, there's only so much energy that we can put toward the future because it's not here yet. Be proud of what you've accomplished. Be proud of the person that you are. Invest your energy in making yourself and others around you feel happy today. When you start to get into those dark places and thinking about what you haven't done or what you think you need to do, always remember that you are here for a reason and if you just let yourself be present for a moment, I guarantee you will appreciate how far you've come and all that you've done.

I feel strongly about this, but the main thing I want you to take away here is this: When things don't work out the way you want them to, take a step back and enjoy the journey. Give yourself a pat on the back and a reminder that when one door closes, another one will open. You have one life, one body and one soul. Be kind to yourself.

- Rach